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12 January 2009 @ 02:50 pm
Party Foul. KaPam.  
I almost forgot about this one. But then I re-read it and realized... I obviously love puns very much.

Title: Party Foul
Author: mrgaritakaraoke
Pairing/Character: Pam/Karen
Rating: G
Summary: The guy that lives next door is having a party and Karen and Pam are invited.
Spoilers: None.
Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Pam knows that Karen is an incredible dork, and she also knows that people tend not to pick up on that because of the fact that, yeah, she’s outrageously good-looking.

When the guy in the apartment next to theirs throws a party, they decide to go just to see if Crazy TheatRE (Not TheatER) Girl from down the hall will show up and reenact the latest art house, underground play she’s written.

Karen throws on a ratty pair of jeans, a t-shirt proclaiming More Cowbell!, and a black zip-up hoodie. She insists, “I’m not out to impress anyone over there. It isn’t like David Wallace is going to show up at Dude’s apartment and start talking paper with me.”

Pam smiles and pulls her hair into a ponytail, then begins to wonder if they should make the effort to learn their neighbor’s real first names (she decides they shouldn’t because she enjoys the nicknames they’ve given them too much).

Karen leans against the doorframe and watches Pam put on a necklace. She smiles widely and says excitedly, “So, what are we gonna name the kitty!?”

“I don’t know,” Pam says. She’s more of a dog person, but they figure it’ll be easier to hide a cat from the landlady. “Sir Meow-Mix-a-Lot?”

“Cat Boone,” Karen offers.

“Acatus Finch.”

“Heathcliff Ledger.”

“Cat Stevens.”

“Obi Wan Catnobi.”


“Optimus Purrime,” Karen says and smiles smugly.

Pam rolls her eyes and pretends not to be amused. “You’re such a dork.”

“I’m naming the cat Optimus Purrime and there’s nothing you can do to stop me,” Karen says and sticks out her tongue.

Pam decides she can’t top a name like that, so she just grabs Karen’s hand and drags her next door. They don’t really know Dude Next Door, but sometimes they’ll chat by the mailboxes and on more than one occasion he’s buzzed them into the building at 4 o’clock in the morning when they were too drunk to find their keys. They figure they owe it to him to at least make an appearance at the party.

Almost everyone from the third floor is in attendance (except for Weird Peter) and Dude has invited some of his friends (or maybe co-workers - they wouldn't know the difference). It doesn’t look like a spectacularly good time, but Pam and Karen grab some wine and decide to make the best of it. They settle on the couch, watch four guys play Rock Band and smirk at how badly they’re doing.

“Is the meter supposed to be in the red like that?” Pam asks.

“Oh, yeah,” Karen replies. “I think that means they’re all winning.”

They smile at each other and ignore the looks the ‘drummer’ is giving them.

After the guys fail the level, the ‘drummer’ curses and goes into the kitchen. The ‘bass player’ and ‘lead guitarist’ follow him, but the ‘singer’ sets down the mic and sits down on the coffee table in front of Pam and Karen.

“I couldn’t help but hear how impressed you were with our skills,” he jokes.

“Yeah, you guys should take that act on the road,” Karen replies.

“We’re thinking about calling the band The Steve Zahn Experience,” he says.

“The guy from Saving Silverman?” Pam says. “What a weird guy to name your band after.”

The guy puts a hand to his heart and says, “Oh! She knows who Steve Zahn is! Marry me.” He takes Karen’s hand and adds, “Don’t worry. I’ve got a guy for you, too. Double wedding.”

Pam smirks and looks at Karen. “Hear that, Karen? He’s got a guy for you.”

“How thoughtful,” Karen says. “I’m willing to bet he’s not my type though.”

“It’s my friend. He was the one playing guitar,” he says. “He’s cute, right?”

“No, yeah, he was,” Karen says. “But not my type.”

“Well then what is your type?” he asks.

Karen tilts her head toward Pam. “She is.”

The guy’s eyes widen. “Oh, my God. You’re… the Hot Neighbors.”

“Well,” Pam says to Karen, “now I don’t feel bad about us giving everyone nicknames.”

They spend a few more minutes talking to him then decide that they’ve effectively made their appearance, so they head back to their apartment.

“Wait, where are you going?” the guy asks.

“Home,” Pam answers.

“Why? What are you gonna do there that's more fun?”

“We’re totally gonna make out,” Pam replies.

They laugh at the expression on his face then walk toward the door.

Karen whispers in Pam’s ear, “So, are we really gonna make out?”

Pam grins and replies, “Totally.”
(Deleted comment)
JENSEN PADALECKI.websofseaweed on January 13th, 2009 10:52 pm (UTC)
i agree with what the poster above me said about the dialogue - it's very office-like.

really, really awesome. i read this at school and squealed and people stared at me.
withpractice_ff on July 25th, 2009 06:55 pm (UTC)
Adorable! Love it!